How Do You Get Passion Or Motivation Back In Your Life?
A few years ago I was working in a job I hated. The job was great - I just hated it anyway. I lost all motivation and passion. I didn't know what to do. I would stay up all night dreading going to work in the morning.
In the morning, I would wake up like being in a daze. In the morning, I felt worse than I did when I went to sleep. I was tired and anxious in the morning because of being awake all night. I lost all my will to go on.
The worst was my productivity was going down at work. How could I work? I was awake all night being anxious. Even though I wanted to work, I couldn't get myself to work. My mind would wander, almost hallucinating.
I was f*&%ed
I thought about leaving the job and going to another company. Then I thought, what if I had the same problem there.
I thought about going to the doctor and see if I had some new-age ailment like ADHD, ADD or some other acronym I did not understand. Then thought, what if they give me anti-depressants and I become addicted.
I would definitely be f*&%ed.
I thought about committing suicide. Jumping off a bridge, or stepping in front of a bus. Then I thought, this would not change anything. My life would really really be f*&%ed.
I knew I was in trouble and had to do something. Get myself back on track, find the passion in life and get motivated.
I was at the end of the line and willing to do anything, just to get back up. I really wanted to get the passion and motivation back in my life.
But the big question was
How Do You Get Passion Or Motivation Back In Your Life?
I tried everything that I could. I talked to my friends, asking them what I could do to get motivated. They just made fun of me and told me I was thankless.
I looked for people in my family who I could ask this question. Someone who could teach me how to get my motivation back. But there was no one that I knew who could help me. No one in my family, in my extended family, or in my parents generation who could help me.
One of my uncle told me, "Don't look for bullsh*t things to chase when you should actually be doing stuff!"
Maybe he was right, maybe he was an a$$hole. His statement didn't really motivate me or get me back on my feet.
I tried going on a vacation but that didn't work. While I was on vacation I kept thinking about the sad existence I was going to come back to. When I came back I was tired from the vacation and felt even worse.
I read all the books I could find to figure out how to get my motivation back. Some of what these books shared worked, but most of it didn't. Most of it was just hokey pokey and didn't really give me a step-by-step process to get passion or motivation back in life.
I even tried doing things for charity, giving to a homeless person, feeding the poor, caring for the needy. It was great while I was doing it - but when the 10 minutes of helping someone were over, I still had to get back to work and get motivated.
Something had to change.
It seemed like the only option for me left was to start taking drugs. I was thinking about doing that late one night, watching some late night TV, when I finally discovered the secret that helped me get my motivation back in life.
The Secret To Getting Your Passion And Motivation In Life
I don't remember what I was exactly watching - but I do remember that I had a clear path in front of me. I decided to give it a try for the next 30 days.
I didn't have anything to lose, so this was the best thing that I could do. The worst thing that could happen for me would be that I would lose 30 days and little bit of sweat.
I was willing to put that effort in - since this was better than the alternative.
Almost like a blinding light, I knew in my hearts of hearts, that this would work. I don't know how - I could not explain it to you - but I knew this would work.
Maybe I was just hoping against hope that my last ditch effort would work to get my motivation back.
I got up immediately and wrote down the exact plan to help me get my motivation back.
Here it is for you.
Why Should You Follow This 3 Step Process
If you follow this process here's what will happen for you.
In 30 days you will be more passionate about your life, your motivation will sky rocket, you will be able to do things that you thought were not possible for you and you will feel significantly better about doing this.
In 90 days you'll notice your life completely changed. You will become one of the most motivated people around.
Your friends will be amazed at the intense passion you have for living life and for doing the things that you want to do. They will start looking up to you for how to have more passion in their lives.
Your family will become extremely proud of you for finally "growing up" and grabbing life by the balls. They won't say it - but you'll know that this is what they are thinking.
You will become the child who is most praised at the dinners, the one the parents boast about, just because you've discovered a new found passion and motivation in life.
If you don't follow this process, here's what will happen to you instead.
In 30 days, you'll discover that you've become even more depressed. You will start feeling like a loser.
Even though you'll know the consequences of not doing things, you won't be able to move to do them because you'll be exhausted from a lack of passion.
Your friends will start ignoring you because you bring a bad vibe to the group. They will insult you and avoid you for being a passionless person with no motivation in life.
In the end your friends will start making plans without telling you and having fun without even inviting you to parties.
Your family will start thinking of you as the "black sheep" of the family. Someone who is a party pooper, who brings down the collective mood of the family.
In the end your family will stop loving you and inviting you to family gatherings and events.
But before you lose all hope, let me share with you the exact process you can use to get passion and motivation in your life.
The 3 Step Process To Get Passion And Motivation In Life
Here is the 3 step process to get passion and motivation in your life.
Step 1. Identify The Anchor
Just like an anchor of a boat keeps it in one place, there is an anchor in your life that is keeping you demotivated. If you bring this anchor up, your ship will start sailing.
But before you can start sailing you need to find out what this anchor is.
So the first thing you need to do is figure out what is bringing you down. What is it in life that is keeping you from being passionate or demotivated?
The more specific you can become the better. You can't just say, I'm demotivated about life. That just being lazy. You need to become laser focused.
For me, in my life. I was demotivated about work. I hated work. I was fine if I was spending time with my family, or going out with my friends - but just because I was demotivated about work - everything else was suffering.
So figure out what is the "The Anchor" of your life.
This could be the lack of having a girlfriend, or finding work boring, or not having enough friends, or having a sh*tty car.
Whatever it is, you need to figure out what this one thing is. The easiest way to do this is find out what you do all day.
Just write it down in a diary and at the end of the day ask yourself, "Did you like it or love it?"
If you loved it, then this is not it. If you liked it then this is not it. But there will be things on the list you'll go, "I didn't like or love this. I wish I didn't have to do this."
The ones you're "bleah" about. These are the ones that are keeping you down.
Write the down on a new paper.
Step 2. Raising The Anchor
Notice how you say that these things are "weighing you down". They are literally become an anchor to your life.
"Keeping you stuck..."
"Holding you back..."
"Tying you down..."
The only way to raise the anchor is to bring it up.
Now that you've identified the things keeping you down lets bring them up.
For each of the thing that you wrote is holding you down, write 3 positive statements about them. These statements have to be in the first person, present tense.
So for me - I hated my work - but I loved my colleagues, I loved the workplace, and the view I had from my desk. It was of the ocean.
So my 3 present tense positive statement became,
- "I'm eager to meet my colleagues at work today."
- "I'm thrilled to work in such a cutting edge workplace."
- "I'm elated by the beautiful view from my dest at work."
These are my examples, use these to create examples of your own for the things that are holding you back.
Write them down. This is very important.
Do this exercise for all the "bleah" things that we identified in step 1 above. If you have a list of 10 things, then at the end of this step you will have a list of 30 positive statements.
Remember, when you're writing these statements be very specific about what you like, why you like it, and how it makes you feel. Not just that you like it - but use emotional words when describing these statements.
Step 3. Creating New Neural Pathways
Research shows that 95% of the thoughts that you think today will be the same as the ones you thought yesterday. And this process will happen every day.
Your thoughts every day are the same, for the most part. Think of this process as putting down a pavement.
If you have a street that is zig-zagging all the way, you can put as much concrete and tar on top of it that won't really make it faster. Unless you zoom out, look at the pavement and think, "Oh! This is so bendy. If I straighten it out - it will be much faster."
Then if you take to the street. Break it down, and then put a new path that runs straight, and pave that straight path. This street will become super fast.
But only if you zoom out and put in the new path. Without the new path you can keep paving the road with the latest technology, and it won't do anything.
So in this step, we're going to put in a new path for your mind. Where thoughts can flow super fast. Where the kind of thoughts that you need to be motivated and passionate can flow super fast.
From now on here's what you're going to do to make this super fast highway in your mind.
a. You're going to keep this a secret until you've become motivated in at least 2 areas of your life. You will use this technique to develop motivation and passion in you and you won't tell this to anyone until you've actually done this.
b. You're going to carry with you the list of 30 positive statements at all times.
c. You will read these statements for 30 days straight, first when you wake up in the morning. Then again right after you have lunch in the afternoon. Then again before you go to sleep. And you're going to read them out loud before you go to sleep.
d. You will not miss a day of reading. If you miss a day, you'll go back to 0 and start over. So it's your job to make yourself read every day, no matter what.
This will help your mind form new thoughts. The more you read them the faster they will get embedded in your mind. And by reading them out loud at night, you are also programming your sub-conscious mind which is way more powerful than your conscious mind.
What Will Happen If You Follow This 3-Step Process
This might sound a little weird, and you might have to make sure no one is listening to you when do this process, but here's what will happen if you do.
You will discover new motivation for doing the things that you thought were too hard to do.
You will find your passion almost instantly. Though you will have to do the work, but when it comes to you - you will be pleasantly surprised at how quickly it came.
Your motivation to do things will rise. You will become a highly motivated and passionate person.
But A Word Of Warning!!!
When you do set out to do this you will encounter some challenges on your way.
The first week you'll feel great and will want to share this technique with your friends and family.
Resist the urge to do this.
They don't understand what you do. Even if you explain it to them, they haven't been through what you have, and they won't understand this.
This will frustrate you. So the best thing to do is not to tell your friends and family. Let them see the results after you've achieved what you've set out to achieve. Then they'll come running after you.
The second week you'll think that you've got this and you don't need to continue. You'll say to yourself you don't need to read this anymore. You've got it nailed. You should stop since this is taking too much time.
Resist the urge.
Your brain is making new neural connections, which is a hard thing to do for the brain. It is physically painful to create new neural connections. Your brain want's you to stop. Just like your muscle screams when you pick up a weight that's too heavy for you.
But if you want your muscle to grow you have to keep going. Just the same, if you want your brain to actually register these new thoughts that you're feeding it - you have to keep going.
Push your brain, and stop listening to the voice inside.
The third week the voice inside will say to you, "I'm sleepy, the bed is warm, I can do this in the morning". The voice will tell you that you already know what you need to know, that you should go to sleep.
Resist the urge.
You'll often forget to read the statements, since your brain is using all the tricks up it's sleeve to stop you. Don't listen to the voice in your head.
Even if you're half asleep and you remember, force yourself to wake up and read the statements. This is very very important. Skipping 5 minutes of sleep won't matter in the long run.
Whenever you remember, read the statements immediately, get up out of bed, take out the statements and read them.
The fourth week you will be able to recite the statements pretty much by heart, but every now and then you'll notice something that you didn't remember. Think about this statement a little bit more.
By now your brain has made the new connections and is comfortable thinking about these statements. You'll notice that you've auto-magically got a new passion for life and living. Your motivation will be sky high.
Keep reading these statements. At this point, when the week ends, do step one of the 3-Step process, so you can identify new places to motivate yourself.
The more you do this, the more motivated you will become. The more you write out and read the positive statements the more passionate you will become.
Once you become passionate and motivate you won't have to convince your parents that you are not a spoiled child. Show them what you're going to do - before you tell them. Then you won't have to tell them, they'll be believers from the get-go.