Winning the break up.
1. Clean up. Clean your bedroom, house, car, dust your shelves, organize your closet and your drawers. Clean up/shave that nasty facial hair (or legs, for you ladies) and get a decent haircut. You deserve this. It will make you feel better.
2. Exercise. Look, I don’t care what your fitness level is. If all you can do is walk around the block for a half hour- do it. It’s important to be out in the real world right now. For those of you who belong to a gym... GO! You’re paying a monthly fee- utilize this. Create a regular workout schedule(4 or 5 days a week).
3. Eat better. Exercising is completely pointless if you return from your run and plump onto the couch with a bag of potato chips. It’s important that you avoid refined sugars, carbs, and saturated fats. Stick to the basics; vegetables, fruits, lean meats, nuts, and lots and lots of water. If you capitalize on the opportunity to be a healthier eater, you will see an abundance of healthy overflow such as: weight loss, self-confidence, and healthier looking and feeling skin.
4. Exercise self-motivation. First, find a photo of yourself from when you were younger, or a photo of somebody that you want to look like regarding body weight, muscle tone, fashion taste, and/or confidence level. When you wake up in the morning, stare at this photo for at least one minute. After you’ve completed this, look yourself in the mirror and compliment the hell out of yourself. One compliment after another. Tell yourself you’re beautiful. Tell yourself you’re hott. Whatever you want to hear others say about you. Naturally, your self-critical mind is going to defend against those compliments with your default truth. “You’re not beautiful, your ugly. Look at your double chin. Look at yourself. You’re hideous.” These ‘default truths’ are liars. Keep complimenting yourself out loud. Physically say these positive encouraging things to your mirror. I guarantee you, after a month of doing this once or twice a day, you’ll begin to believe yourself, thus revealing the truths behind your value as a human being.
5. Put yourself out there. Remember, you’re not going to get over your heartbreaker if you don’t put yourself out there every once and a while. Create small talk with your barista, bar tender, the person next to you on the subway. If they don’t want to talk, they will make it clear to you via body language--be sure to pay attention to this.
This isn't about ‘winning the break up’. It’s about moving on to the next significant person in your life. The next man or woman might not be ‘the one’, and that’s okay because you’re a different person now. You no longer find your worth in the person you’re dating. You no longer are defined by your relationship.
If you have to ask yourself and wonder if they are ‘the one’ or not, they probably aren't. Their exodus hurts. There’s no getting around this pain. The point isn't to avoid the pain--the point is to respond to it in a healthy, self-constructive way.
Build yourself up. Become the person you deserve to be. The voice in your head saying otherwise is a liar and a thief. The voice in your head that is downshifting your worth does not want you to be happy... and neither does your heartbreaker. So what’ll it be?